Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
