I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
A bitchslap is in order.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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