Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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