what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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