So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
