We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
