Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I want to make a zoo with you.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
