You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
