At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Randomize