Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Randomize
