sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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