I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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