I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
