she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
