Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
