bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The beer is more important than you right now.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
She has the best kind of daddy issues
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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