She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
