bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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