help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
