girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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