She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
