how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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