oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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