belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
