our cab driver is having phone sex.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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