it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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