we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Life is so much better after having sex.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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