i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
