Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize