He asked to "fluff my boner.."
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
