You're so nebulous sometimes
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
