I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
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