she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
