STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
pop tarts are not kleenex
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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