All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
