susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
