the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
