He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
