So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
