So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
