The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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