that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
