everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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