I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
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