i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize