none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize