Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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