He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Randomize
