Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
True strength comes from lack of pants
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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