How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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