I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
