"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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